Monday, November 03, 2008

Control Freak

I am constantly working on becoming less of a Control Freak, and more of a 'Jesus
Freak.' God is constantly working on this with me. Oh how I wish I always held uppermost in my head that He loves me, and cares for me, and is completely in control of Me regardless of any outside influence. Yet....in my head for some reason I just can't even imagine my doctor could possibly begin to perform an hour long surgery on me without getting input before, during, and after surgery from me?! How in the world will he know which tools I would prefer he use, exactly what location I'd like him to cut...and not cut, and about the swarm of dainty butterflies I was thinking could gently lift my gallbladder from my body, as opposed to the shiny metal tools? ...and then I begin to suspect the 'going under part' has as much to do with not having to deal with patients like me for an hour, than the actual need for me to be unaware due to pain. I've been so thinking about my chapped lips....and what if the nurse forgets to ask me if I'm thirsty, and I forget to tell her I've been thinking about how thirsty I am going to be after the surgery three weeks prior to the surgery? Oh self, stop! Other than that, I'm at peace, and I plan to get some sleep, so I can wake up, and get some more sleep...and start my 'four day vacation.' :O) "Never be fearful of God’s love and plan for your life" Jer 29:11. Phil 4:6-7

1 comments:

Jo said...

When you have time, check out Higglytown Heros on Playhouse Disney. The character, "Twinkle", has these beautiful and creative ideas on how to solve their problems. A lot like your butterflies. I can now say I know and am friends with "Twinkle".