Saturday, January 01, 2011

New Year's Review, Reflections, Resolutiuons, with a side of Ramblings

It so many ways this new beginning looks a lot like my last year's new beginning. 
Same bat time. 
Same bat place.
A few more pounds. 
Ooops.
A few more friends on the net. 
Yay!
It's hard to really wrap my mind around the things that might or might not have changed the course of my life this year in more drastic ways than I can see as I simply concentrate on the next step that looks suspiciously like the last. 
Sometimes it's hard to realize your direction has changed until you get a little further down the road and realize the markers aren't what you expected, or recognize. 
I was never good with directions. 
Every year day, I think I've learned something new about me, but I find I often relearn the same things I already learned because I didn't actually learn (retain) the lesson the first time around. 
I find the people I respect the most don't hold the world's view of the most respectable positions. 
The older I get, the less I want. 
The older I get, the faster time moves. 
I'm about as good at resolutions as I ever was, but I'm in more need of following through with some of these resolutions than I've ever have been. 
I realized most people subsitute 'can't' when it should be 'don't want to.' 
I can forgive 'don't want to.'
I 'can't' stand 'can't.'
I realize it may take me longer, but there aren't a lot of things I 'can't' do given enough tools, time, and a creative vocabulary.
This year I installed a door knob and lock. 
This year I jumped a car.
This year I mounted a blacksplash. 
This year I caulked the bathtub. 
This year I patched and painted walls, and filled gaps with random sticks, and paint and creative home repair devices. 
I am a contractor's worst nightmare.
These are all things I didn't want to do. 
These are all things I can do. 
These are all things I hope I don't have to do next year.
...or the next.
I'm driven by list. 
I'm motivated by list. 
I'm tormented by list.  '
I'm inspired by list. 
I'm more disorganized than ever. 
I'm more productive than ever. 
The more I travel, the more I just want to be at home.
Negativity is poison. 
I'm far too negative. 
There are few people that can love unconditionally. 
Too many people set conditions on their love.
Too many people set conditions on their friendship. 
The best way to be a friend is to lower your expectations (they're probably not realistic as long as we are dealing with humans), and increase the love you feel for someone.
I'm human.
Everybody needs unconditional love. 
You can love unconditionally, but not stand in the direct line of someone that doesn't treat you with respect. 
I am grateful that I have friends who have loved me unconditionally this year.
Girl's have wild imaginations about the world, actions, reactions, and responses from the world around them. 
I am, definitly, a girl. 
The world would be better if we expected less of others, and more of ourselves. 
Puppies make me happy. 
I love sticks. 
I love cookie cutters. 
I love buttons. 
I love tags.
I love hand written recipes more than buttons, sticks, or cookie cutters. 
I drink too much Diet Coke.
I know exactly where my kidneys are located, sometimes they say, 'hello.' 
Gray defined my favorite color this year.
'Favorite' is still one of my favorite words.
At the end of next year I'll probably reflect again. 
It may look a lot like this year. 
...or....
I may be reflecting on a scrap of paper in Timbuktu. 
I'll still reflect. 
I'll set new goals. 
I'll be a year older. 
This year will be a little less clear. 
A New Year scares me, it goes so quickly. 
A New Year refreshes me, it's a new start on conquering bad habits. 
Happy New Year to you, whether it feels like a depressing change, or a refreshing start....it's here.
The year is ready for you to write the next chapter. 
I'm going to make it a chapter filled with joy....
....with a side of cupcakes.